I love to hold hands, take long walks on the beach--although I do not live close to one currently--and talk about pretty much nothing of any material consequence for hours on end, not to mention listening--Oh, boy, how I love to do that! And I never, ever bluff at poker--really. Wink-wink.

Some of my "likes" (in no particular order): 1) Corvettes 2) playing golf 3) playing poker 4) enjoying my backyard 5) raising cattle--although not raising many these days, I still like to eat them--oh so yummy in my tummy! 6) living in the country 7) (things related to the 2nd amendment--shhh.)

Not so much (also in no particular order): 1) living in a city--done that for far too many years early in life. 2) lies and/or cheating--I really, really, really hate those two things. 3) The Modus Operandi of, what I call, "The 300 Club" (so named due to their general rankings here at Replay--300,000+) AKA "Bingo Players": Pre-flop pushing in of chips for the purpose of quick gain. I understand the strategy. I just don't think people would do that very often if they were playing with real money. To me, it just devalues the overall faux poker experience. 4) tyranny.

My Personal Poker Motto #1: --Most of the time, apparently--"Fold the winners; Play the losers." (On a somewhat loosely connected note: I have never bought a single chip here at Replay Poker.}

My Personal Poker Motto #2: "Never ever underestimate the determination of a devious flop to devastate and render utterly useless two wonderful and highly valued hole cards!"

My Personal General Life Motto: Si possus hic recitare, tenes multus quoque disciplina (sarcasm required).

A bit of personal wisdom: I now understand why they call the last card the river--you could be doing quite well through the turn, but that last card can get you to wave good bye to your chips as they float along downstream to another's pile.

Now, if you have read this far, you deserve something of value, a small reward, if you will.

My real name is Mike--please call me Toucan at the tables--and strategically, as far as poker is concerned, I play a pretty decent game of "Ambush Predator." If I am on my game, I'll let my potential prey get over-confident until heavily committed, and then I have him trapped, or at least grab a chunk of his chips. Of course, I have a variety of strategies, like losing a few obviously amateurishly played hands to set people up for the trap. Another strategy is to plant seeds of distraction like this diatribe to mislead those who want a "leg up" on my play. Heh, heh. See you at the tables, and please, please, please bring lots of chips. :-) We'll have fun.