well I'm a gonna say I'm not so slow as I walk lazy nor can call it as like I be a pretending I'm all smart n' edumicated and wanna be a using them big words like marmalade (they's just squished oranges) . i aint got me no ider how this new fangld thingy-ma -bob computer works but here i am sittin n' playing on the world wide web gainst folks from all over and yonder. hope all y'all like these unders i'm a wearin, them be fresh on this season, shop new and paid fer.

You can find all sorts a things on this here machine. why only t'other day a cousin i nevir knowed i had sent me one of those email thingys clean outa the blue. He's been doing right fine for hisself and is a Prince in some far off place and he has more money than he know what to do with. says he gonna give me a whole pile of it once i pay fer to have that money brung over. sure is a fine feller.

Nuther thing happined to me all cos of this here computer. Some pretty lil thing says she likes the cut of my jib and would like to be a marrying a fine feller like me. Well I had figured I'd nevir be marrying nobody after all that disappointment I had when my girl Sarajane done run off and married Becky. I hadn't expected that with them being first cousins an all. This young lady tells me her name is Mary (same as my momma) and she comes from a place called Ukrainium.

She wants to be a marrying me right soon but afore that can happin her pappy needs some doctoring that costs a whole lot of money. Right then I done told her I would send what I can to help my future pappy-in-law get hisself all fixed up. Mary sure seemed mighty thankful for my offer and explained to me that if she has my bank infermation she can git her pappy fixed up an buy harself a ticket on one of them jetplains and git here and be a marrying me lickedy split. Fine girl to be a worrying about her pappy like that.