B.S. Hits All-Time High With New Las Vegas Weddings Campaign

By Scott Roeben, on November 22 2021
3 min read 11 comments
Las Vegas Las Vegas WTF

The Las Vegas Convention and Visitors Authority (LVCVA) has launched a new advertising campaign to promote the wedding industry in Las Vegas.

The weddings-focused campaign is titled, wait for it, “Forever Happens Here.”

The phrase is a nod to one of the most recognizable marketing slogans in the history of words, “What happens here, stays here.” (Not the often misquoted “What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas,” by the way.)

What do these taglines have in common? Well, for starters, they were both created by R&R Partners, the ad agency of record for the LVCVA.

More awkwardly, though: Both taglines are, in the parlance of the marketing, utter horseshit.

Palace Bar Four Queens
You either get Vegas weddings or you don’t.

While we understand the unique requirements of marketing copywriting (we’ve done it professionally for Caesars Entertainment, Fremont Street Experience and others), saying
“Forever Happens Here” flies in the face of everything we know about the success rate of marriages.

Granted, “Temporary Happens Here” doesn’t have a great ring to it, but facts are facts.

About half of all marriages in the U.S. end in divorce or separation.

Experts say 67% of second marriages, and 73% of third marriages, tank.

Clearly, practice does not make perfect.

This disengenuous slogan needs a rewrite. We’re here to help!

Here are some suggestions for a new tagline for Las Vegas weddings:

  • “Forever Could Possibly Happen Here, Although It’s Pretty Much a Coin Toss.”
  • “You Got Her Pregnant, You’re on the Hook, Get Hitched in Vegas.”
  • “Yes, You’re Making a Stupid Mistake, but Chances Are It’s Not Your Stupidest.”
  • “Ask Your Friends Going Through Hellish Divorces What ‘Forever’ Looks Like.”
  • “Forever Happens Here if You Have No Idea What the Word ‘Forever’ Means.”
  • “Community Property Happens Here.”
  • “Cash Happens Here Because Your Wedding Guests Aren’t Lugging KitchenAids on Southwest.”
  • “Wedding License Fee: $102. Marrying Someone Your Parents Hate: Priceless.”
  • “Divorces Happen Here and Those Are Forever Far More Often Than Marriages.”
  • “You Could Probably Marry Nicholas Cage Here if You’re Into That.”
  • “Getting Wasted in Vegas Is the Only Shot You Have for a Threesome With Your Girl’s Maid of Honor, So There’s That.”
  • “We’ll Keep This Simple. Run, Just Run.”

Just spit-balling here. You’re welcome, LVCVA!

Mob Museum
Mob Museum wedding. Oscar Goodman officiating. That was legitimatly badass.

A weddings-focused campaign has been necessitated by a precipitous drop in marriages in Las Vegas.

Before the Dark Times, in 2019, 73,000 weddings were held in Clark County (which includes the Las Vegas Strip). That sounds like a lot, but it’s a 40% decrease from 2004’s numbers, when about 128,000 weddings happened.

Las Vegas weddings have seen a surge as the pandemic has eased up, but it’s hard to buck big picture trends. U.S. marriage rates are at an all-time low.

Still, a lot of folks in the wedding industry are pinning their hopes on this new campaign to spark more interest in Las Vegas for destination weddings.

It’s expected that in 2022, Clark County will issue its five millionth wedding license.

Glass half full, that represents 2.5 million happy marriages! Well, marriages.

Let’s get blitzed and do the chicken dance!

Las Vegas Wedding Wagon
Can’t find a venue? In Vegas, the venue comes to you.

We are a hopeless romantic, so we’re going to give “Forever Happens Here” a pass despite the slogan’s tone-deaf whimsy.

Technically, if forever ever happened here, even once, the slogan is valid, right?

Las Vegas is a town built on optimism!

It’s also worth noting “Forever Happens Here” is sort of perfect for a town built on people completely ignoring the odds.

Here’s more about the new Las Vegas weddings ad campaign. Wading boots recommended.